Updated: Jan 15, 2021
Here's today blog, Fighting to the end! To forgive, you must trust the healing process. Here I am, once again, I ask myself. Why? Why am I here question myself about unforgiveness? Just a few months ago, I was rejoicing in my freedom of forgiveness. And how good it felt to be free from my past pain. And I was walking in my healing. Wow! No residue! But wait here, I 'm here again feeling hurt, hurt, I thought I would never have to feel again. It caught me off guard. What a humbling moment, I am questioning myself. Am I not praying enough? Do I need to read my word more? My Lord, what is going on!
I was feeling the spirit of heaviness and rejection, not wanting to get out of bed. The only reason I did because I refuse to accept that bitterness and unforgiveness have power over my life again. But, what do I do, I've prayed the only thing I know to do. I God ask, "How did this happen"? "How did I let this enter back into my life"? Have you ever felt so good that you stop watching? You say ok, I'm good. I don't ever worry that those issues again. So, you let your guard down. While! Let me be the first one to tell you never, let your guard down. The enemy is always looking for entering to take you down. He's a thief in the night. The devil comes only to kill, steal, and destroy you. My sleep pattern began to change. I start feeling emotionally unstable, confused about what I should be doing for the Lord. Can I be transparent?
I was feeling lost and discouraged. However, right during this time, God was blessings me and opening doors, and I was walking in my purpose, and I had a new friend in my life and Ministry but, yet confusion began to set in. You may be asking yourself how did I know it was unforgiveness and bitterness. You remember, in my latest blog post, "The Power of Unforgiveness." I talk about self-check. Along with prayer, I began to self-check identifying when the heaviness started. The Holy Spirit brought all back to my memory. Thank Lord, I sever a God that His grace is sufficient. And the mercy of God renews daily. I found peace in knowing God watches over His word to perform it. Healing and deliverance are still mines. So, I repented! Ask God to forgive me for letting unforgiveness and bitterness access back into my life. I forgave my offender and myself. What did I learn? God can deliver and heal you in a moment, but you MUST fight for your freedom. Healing is a process. To stay free, you must fight.
Anytime you feel like someone has offended you. Please address the matter as soon as you can. If you don't think there's going to be a resolution, release them and let go. Give it to God. use your fighting tools the word of God and Prayer. Sometimes having an accountability partner helps — someone who tells you the truth and pray with you. You don't need an amen corner. Watch and pray. Matthew 26:41 Jesus is telling us to look out for the desires of the world can pull us away from God. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. Remember, the enemy only knows your past behaviors. He has no new treats, just the same old ones. Seek God for a new way to handle strife and contention. Don't let the devil confuse you, confuse the devil.